Silklilly speaking: i am so sad

Today i am sad
I am so sad.. You can see that I've gone past the time when i am grumpy i don't throw fits or chilidish temper tantrums i am just sad.
I am not depressed i am jyst so majorly sad i don't want to wake up tomorrow for so many reasons i wish they would close up my chest and end it the way they blind me from seeing the beautiful colors of everything.. I am so sad that the sky is not grey anymore the cars are not all in blue i am so sad that my skin has turned so cold and my tears can be stored for the next drought or maybe used to keep some fish alive which is a pretty thought at least  that way i could be useful..i am so sad that figures are mere shallow shapes and colors are now a few oversaturated blobs escaping the thick black film covering my eyes.. I am so sad that i have abused every single ounce of energy  inside me to not  feel that way but i still do..  I failed...  I am scared and tired and sad so sad

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