silk lilly speaking: the baptism

Speaking to the skies in their own language dipping my self in holy water i am standing alone yet i have the mountains holding my back feet so deep in the water my body means more than it has ever did i am calm but my heart is humming to new rhythms.. now i cut all the poor old ties the fake bonds i drown the words of desperation and stand in the middle of the world allowing myself to be finally accepted physically and mentally as a part of something bigger of endless horizon unseen powers that are felt so deeply they shake you to the core . I am no longer a healer i am not a savior not a goddess or even a mother I don't curse my memories I don't believe in the past anymore now i stand with pure blood untainted by lies untouched by hate my time isn't defined by lovers and truths aren't bent to match the curve of my waist.
Letters are written lost and rewritten hidden in closets waiting for when i leave to finally mean something history is dangerous it's manipulative and by now i know it's devils i know how they convinced you that you aren't worth it how they had driven you to the edge of the mountain after you climbed it for all the wrong reasons after your anger was all you felt how they dared to tell you who you truly are until you jumped off the cliff threw yourself off the mountain until angels ran to pick you you up sedated you so you were watching the world behind glazed eyes slumped hands and heavy feet until you were back
You are back and there's nothing you need to do you shall open all the books shout all the words plant all kinds of seeds let them live or die carry what your body wants to carry sport it for days sport it for hours for minutes don't sport it at all let it all fall let it all go let them all go pray for angels pray for the god who saved you to drive the mouths running on hatred and assumptions out of your life push them off your cliff into somebody else's lands and watch yourself feel what you were meant to and act upon your heart






Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

silklilly speaking : stand up babygirl 1st december diary entry

Image
I am fighting in my own very soft way fighting my demons delicately wrapping the silk of my words around their necks tenderly enough to silence them but not to kill them because honestly my demons are now a part of me the little ghosts have their place carved in the curve of my waist and even though the rivers of tears have dried and turned into deep dry cracks visible scars going all over  me and my possessions i enjoy gardening them watering them with prayers so you can’t see how deep they are under all the soft pink petals unless you dig very deep in my chest then another woman will have to be born and i as you know me i as i know myself will leave for good .... Now the word is getting grayer and i am getting paler softer in a different way pinker lilac between the creases the folds of my body my eyes are getting wider my hair is harder and longer my hair is the rope that keeps me from falling into unknown pits although some of them could be harmless we aren’...
Read more

ديوان صديقي الله لزياد الرحباني

Image
لمى -صديقي الله  الديوان الوحيد وغير المعروف لزياد الرحباني، والذي كتبه في سنّ الحادية عشرة ، منقول من «الغاوون»، العدد 7، 1 أيلول 2008 1 أنا صغير ولسادس مرّة أطفئ الشموع ما أحلى الحياة عند إطفاءة شموع سادسة ما أعرف؟ لا أعرف شيئاً لا أعرف إلا أنّ لي بيتاً بجدران سريراً وصورتَين خبزاً وماء لا غير وأصبحت دنياي بيتاً بجدران سريراً وصورتين خبزاً وماء لا غير. 2 وقالوا يوماً: إن الله صديقي ورحت أفتّش عن صديقي في الأحراج، بين الزهور في الأشجار المورقة، وراء الصخور وخافت منّي العصافير وهربت تُرى صديقي كالعصافير خاف مني وهرب؟ وسألتهم: صديقي هل يخاف؟ قالوا: يخاف ألا تحبّه. وقلت: أين هو؟ وقالوا: في كل مكان. 3 إذا جئت يا صديقي فنذهب إلى الأحراج نذهب إليها نسرقها نقول إنها لنا لي ولك، لا أحد يسمعنا إذا أردت أن تأتي فتعال قبل الشتاء في الشتاء طُرُق المجيء مسكّرة وطرق السفر يقف عليها أُناس كثيرون، لا يبكون، لا يضحكون إنهم مسافرون وعصافير تنتظر موكب الريح هل يصل صوتي إليك عبر كل هذه الأوراق المتسا...
Read more

late night awakening: one more time

Image
2/5/2016: it's summer already and the stars I've kissed blindly in the winter cold are coming out of their hiding in tribes I recognized my star from when the earth started feeling a little tender under my feet when the words I've sent her  echoed in my ears when a feeling to just be completely embraced ,enveloped washed all over me i then looked up to meet her gaze and my insides melted i went back to feeling myself as if i was under water all this time holding my breath and suddenly my needy lungs got the air they needed. Some are asking me to visit lands where my hands can cup a tree where all the flowers it knows are those that are in my hands those sprouting from my back and the ones on my head when i'll step foot in it .they are asking me to give it a chance that i don't have in me ,telling me that it's sunny just the way i like it. and i swear I didn't stay in the wind's lands alone for that long ,chose to build and rebuild my home alone after ev...
Read more